No Job/Wedding/Graduation/Flowers

Well it looks like I probably didn't get the behavioral tech job. It is now Wednesday and I sent them an email last night asking if the position is still open. I haven't heard anything back but I am guessing they decided to go with another candidate. I'm not too upset but just a little sad I didn't get the chance to work there. This at least means though that my weekends will still be somewhat free and I can sometime in the near future take a little vacation with Curtis. We are hoping to go to Cocoa Beach and Cape Canaveral area to see the Kennedy Space Center. I have been saving up and I want to get a hotel on the beach even if it is not an ocean view. The problem there comes in that it is so expensive. I want to try and keep the cost of the hotel to be around 60 bucks and with it being this time of the year that is going to be difficult.

Tomorrow night my best friend flies in from Boston then she, myself, her mom and two brothers who are staying at my place for the night are all going to drive to Tallahassee for her graduation. She is getting her masters in Child Psychology. I can't wait to see her. Its been almost a year I think since the last time I saw her and this will also be the first time she meets Curtis. Granted it will be a short meeting because all of us have to get some rest before the drive. I also hope our room mate will just go to bed and not wonder in and out of the house and keep them awake since they will be sleeping on the couch.

I keep thinking about moving the wedding day up to August 8th which is a Monday but I don't know if we are going to have enough money saved up by then to actually have a nice wedding. The little Hungarian church is a good idea but I don't know if there would be enough room for everyone to dance and eat etc. They also said they would cater but I would prefer a sit down dinner for the wedding. Another girl from the restuarant may also be going on vacation that same weekend on top of everything else so that may not work out either. I guess part of me is just sick of waiting. But once I start adding everything up in my head as far as dress tux cake food etc. I have to admit to myself that its just not enough money yet. Curtis mentioned doing a pot-luck dinner thing but that just seems so cheap and cheesy to me.

As you can tell from the pictures above my little garden is growing big time. The radish are growing the fastest (the one in the first and second picture) and the squash I planted with the radish are really starting to grow (they are the two plants that are taller and have thicker stems then the radish). My flowers in the little blue pots are growing pretty quickly too but not as fast as some of the other items.

I am getting so into this planting thing that I actually bought more planters, the last picture the light blue one in the corner is going to be the biggest challenge seeing as they are cherry tomato plants and from what I have heard they are some of the hardest things to grow.

The red pot (which yes is actually one kids use to make sand castles) has carrot seeds and I have two other big plastic bowls (again not really meant for planting things but work just as well and are only $1 at walmart) one is growing poppy flowers (which I love but apparently take 180-300 days to grow) and the other has snap dragons which I have always loved since I was a kid in Hungary.

Hopefully everything will bloom, and bloom before we move so it will be easier to move the potted plants. I'm keeping my fingers crossed and a green thumb up in the air.

Today is Monday

Today is Monday. What does that mean besides another lovely week of work? It means that today I am should be getting an email or a phone call letting me know whether or not I got the Behavioral Tech job. I say should because if they did a lot of interviews, and I didn't get the job, they may not get in contact with me at all. It also means I am glancing at my phone every 10 seconds to see if I have any new emails. Every time I think I see the little green light that lets me know I have an email I pick up my phone and unlock it just to make sure my phone isn't messing up on today of all days. Has my phone ever messed up and randomly had the green light go off when there were really no new emails? No... but hey this could be the day right so I better keep an extra eye on it.

I already, in the course of writing this out, have probably looked at my phone over a dozen times.

The weekend was pretty uneventful really. Neither of us really get into celebrating Easter but I did manage to grab a couple of plastic eggs from work and draw a little bunny and chick on them and hide it around the house on Saturday. I made Curtis go look for them after he slept in till 11 (which he needed) and we played the hot and cold game. *just unlocked my phone again to see if I have anything new* I just put a couple of little chocolates in the eggs nothing big but I think it was fun.

I spent a ridiculous amount of money on going out last weekend so this weekend we pretty much stayed in. We did end up going to Ocean Blue but only had a couple of things of their half off menu so the final tab wasn't too bad.

I called my mom on Easter only to find out that she is in Arizona visiting with a friend of the family (who I can't stand because she and my mom would get together and discuss me being fat and "suggest" ways for me to lose weight). Well I found out she went with George (who is also another friend of the family and kind of like my dad) *just saw the green light lit up on my phone, it was junk mail* I know they didn't mean to but I kind of felt left out. She had to get off the phone quickly because they were playing a game and it sort of just felt like I wasn't a part of being invited and I was just bothering them by calling. Now I know I am dwelling in that a little too much and I should just take it with a grain of salt but it would have been nice if someone at least asked me if I wanted to go. oh well.

I also received a phone call from my grandmother in Hungary (this is a very rare occurrence) and she said she finally got a computer so she wanted to know what my email address was. In the mean time I told her there was going to be a wedding soon. And both she and my grandfather congratulated me and she said she wished she could be there. She also threw in a "its about time you're 26!" which really just made me laugh because thats just the mentality of that generation over there. In their eyes I should have been married and had babies by now.

Speaking of babies, seeing as I will not be having any for a while I started a small garden out on our patio. I am VERY suprised at how well its going.

This picture was taken I believe Friday and they have doubled in size since then. They are radish plants. The sushi restuarant actually uses the green part of the plant in one of their roles. I did pluck one cleaned it off and ate the stem (not the leaves) and it had the lightest little radish flavor, it was pretty neat. I am also growing some flowers in blue planters (aka plastic bowls) and there are a couple of squash seeds in the picture above that are just barely starting to sprout.

This is the first time I have every really planted anything and I think it is so neat to see these little guys grow. I want to maybe have a little cherry tomato plant growing soon but I know those are pretty hard to grow so we'll see. I got all the supplies at the dollar store of all places too! I don't mean a dollar general I am talking dollar tree where everything is a dollar. That includes the dirt I am using because god only knows the only kind of dirt I am getting outside in Florida is sand.

I will try and update the photos of the plants from time to time and see if i can convince Curtis to make some more sushi using the little radish plants.

Work Unpleasantires.

Okay so I know I shouldn't be upset by this but no one and I mean NO ONE noticed my ring at work. Now the two girls I talk to the most were both out today and I mainly work with men so I guess its understandable. But Curtis sent me flowers and again, no one said anything. It really does feel like I don't exist there. It just makes me sad. I know its not like I go out of my way to say things to others either but just one nice compliment today about my ring or my flowers would have really helped out. I don't know why I feel so down.

I am grateful for Curtis and the wonderful valentines day weekend we had together but I really wish I had someone to talk to about all this. Someone to share my joy with. I thought through this weekend my anxiety was getting better but now its just coming back again. No word from either of Justin's doctors. I want this feeling to go away.

I have so much to do all this week.
Monday Curtis is working till11-midnight so I won't see him.
Tomorrow I have a court hearing for a friend's custody battle and then straight to work and Curtis works till 9:30 so I won't really see him then.
Wednesday I have an interview right after work Curtis has class till 9-9:30.
Thursday I have normal work hours and Curtis works till 9:30
Friday I am taking the day off (thank god) but have a dentist appointment at 8:15am, we get to spend the rest of the day together but he will be practicing bass guitar and then we are off to DOA so I can see him preform for the first time.
Saturday finishing up DOA he then goes to work till 9:30pm
Sunday without a doubt he is working 12-6:30 Monday back to work as usual.
Tuesday he goes to the dentist then school then possibly work...

I want a break.

I want some friends.

I have so much I know that but I guess this is me being greedy.

Best Valentine's Day yet

So this weekend we finally got my engagement ring from Curtis's Step dad and my god I was like a 5 year old jumping up and down and laughing maniacally. I haven't stopped staring at it since. I know its a material object and I shouldn't be so engrossed by it but look at it! I am beyond happy!!! my face hurt from smiling all weekend.

Today at work Curtis had flowers delivered to me and he very sneakily placed a card in my purse.  The card on the flowers read this: "I love you beyond words and beyond worlds. You make me more complete than I have every hoped to be and regardless of whatever happens or comes up, I will always be here. Always. Love, Curtis.

On Saturday I took us out as a surprise for a couples massage at Essentials Massage it was the first one he and I had ever received and it felt amazing!

I gave him chocolates this morning while we were still in bed and when he gets home he will get the card I got him.

That about sums up my Valentine's Day. Its been wonderful.

Now Where Did I Put that Wedding?

So I have no idea where to have the wedding.

NOT on the beach, I am well aware I live in Florida and the coast line is beautiful and blah blah blah, but if I am going to spend a couple of hundred dollars on an ivory dress I can't see myself mucking it up with sand. And I will NOT wear an above the knee dress. So that cheap version is out of the questions.

I could go with a park to save on cost and I would like to have an outside ceremony BUT I want the option to have it inside if the weather goes sour. so that means paying for a venue which will cost a ton of money. I am hoping to get some sort of a package deal with the ceremony and food and flowers. But again money money money.

I think we have the music and photographer under our belt (well maybe the photographer I still want a professional there instead of  student).

I was also thinking about maybe having the wedding on a cruise or on a boat. I just don;t know how many of our friends would be able to be there if we did that. Not to mention I have like NO ONE to invite. I think max my list of people who I am inviting to the wedding is like 10.. maybe..

Angie
Mom
George
Angie's Mom
Angie's Older Brother
Angie's Younger Brother (maybe)

and all those minus George and Angie's little brother MIGHT have a +1 added to it.

I was thinking about inviting Attumn too but she never really comes through at the end so I think I will leave her out of the list.

I don't even know how many people Curtis wants to invite, I really don't feel like having girl's he has had a crush on/messed around with/or dated at my wedding. I know I will probably have to make an exception or two but meh... We both deserve to have a good time at the wedding after all.

But it doesn't matter how many people are going to go IF we have no where to have it.

And call me finicky but I do NOT want to have it at someones house. Or god forbid at our apartment complex.

I still don't know how I am going to raise money for this wedding.